Is Sohum Joshi A Bum Yet?

When this countdown reaches zero on January 1st, 2030, Sohum Joshi will have met all four terms of his pledge or he will not have. He set the terms. He set the date. Nobody asked him to.

"By January 1st 2030 I'll have a job, I'll have a girl, I won't have three baby mamas out here failing to pay child support, and I won't be living at home — I'll own a house. Write it down."

The Four Terms

1. He will get a job.No progressHis résumé was last revised in 2021. It lists Microsoft Word twice — once under Skills and once under Software — and closes on the line "detail-orientated". Four applications have been submitted since the pledge, three of them to the same posting, which has since been filled by somebody else. He describes his present situation as "between opportunities", a construction that requires a prior opportunity.
2. He will get a girl.UnverifiedThe subject reports an ongoing situation. The situation has been ongoing for nineteen months and has not, at time of review, involved a second party. His longest recorded conversation with a woman he is not related to ran four minutes, took place at a Chipotle, and concerned the chicken. He maintains that she started it. She did. She was taking his order.
3. He will not have three baby mamas and be failing to pay child support.DisputedThe subject puts this figure at zero and has volunteered it, unprompted, on two separate occasions as evidence of good character. This page notes that it is the least impressive way anybody has ever cleared a bar. It further notes that a man cannot fail to pay child support on an annual income of zero dollars — the money has to exist before it can go unpaid. Meeting a requirement by having no means to breach it is not compliance. It is a rounding error.
4. He will not live at home. He will own a house.No progressHe continues to reside in the finished basement of a house he does not own, under a lease he has described in writing as "implied". His down-payment fund stands at $312.00, down from $340.00 after a Steam sale he has declined to discuss. He has, however, viewed forty-one listings in neighbourhoods he could not afford in either of two lifetimes, and has twice used the phrase "when I close".

The Numbers

1. Applications submitted since the pledge — 4
2. Of those, sent to the same posting — 3
3. Interviews granted — 0
4. Unread recruiter emails — 1,284
5. Commute, bed to desk — 1.4 m
6. Rent paid, lifetime — $0.00
7. Down-payment fund — $312.00
8. Dependents claimed — 0
9. Dependents supported — 0
10. Hours logged in games on this website, same period — 2,190

Days elapsed since the pledge: calculating.

Who Is Sohum Joshi?

Sohum Joshi is a man of enormous stated ambition and no observable output. He is twenty-something, unemployed first by circumstance and then by preference, and holds firm opinions on markets he has never participated in, relationships he has never had, and property he has never owned. He speaks about his future in the present tense. He has never once been early.

He is not a bad person. He is a bum. Those are two different findings and this page is only qualified to make the second one. The terms above are his, verbatim, and the deadline is his too — this page simply keeps time.

A full account of his activity here — the posts, the placements, the two thousand one hundred and ninety hours — is public and open to review. His profile and the standings update continuously and have never once updated in his favour.

This review runs until January 1st, 2030. It can be ended early. He knows how.